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1/10/2025

Friday, January 10th, 2025 03:12 pm

check out today's entry at its real home as part of our new year's "daily HTML project"!

Today's Thoughts:

On the surface it looks like we didn't get a lot done today, but I'm actually really happy with the day. I, Kurt, almost never front, and when I do I'm usually pretty anti social. So I feel very good about talking online, and going for a walk today. Plus, I did get some art done today, the Avalanche Trio pic! And I got all the really necessary chores done anyway. Someone else can do more of them on another day!

Also we've had some pretty huge writing accomplishments in the past few days. We finished Red Shift (the last few chapters still need to be edited and posted) and yesterday we finished the writing for and posted the last chapter of Ragpickers and Urchins! Which we're very proud of. So I think we deserve a slightly more lazy day.

Plus, this weekend is going to be the weekend that we finish playing Final Fantasy 7: Rebirth, and we all know it's going to be a huge emotional gut punch and take a lot of spoons to deal with. That's why we put off playing FF7 all week, so we wouldn't have to deal with the feelings in the middle of the week. Since we haven't been playing it, our partners have been playing Infinity Nikki instead which is pleasant background noise.

I'm about to get up and start dinner. I wasn't even going to bother to do an HTML page today, or write a diary entry, but then I thought about how I'm never at the front and if I don't write about it, today will probably just get lost in the memory hole. So I wanted to write about it <3

I spent the morning with Jessie in deluge system (and Biggs!) and we're planning to hang out more this weekend, so that will be really nice, and I'm looking forward to it.

Maybe I'll add more to this later.

Accomplishments:

Catbox cleaned
Dishes done
Wiped Stove
Socialized online (this is an accomplishment for me)
20 minute walk

Dinner:

Baked Chicken thighs, mashed potatos and gravy, and brussel sprouts
(Wanted pizza but we have a long weekend coming up so its better to have it then.

fic:

Finished the last chapter of Ragpickers & Urchins yesterday
3k of Fire in the Belly written yesterday
Working on planning for ff7 fic Tomorrow Crisis
Started editing chapter 20 of Red Shift

Art (from the last several days):

dividers by king-lulu-deer

Tags:

daily liveblogging

[fanart] The Seduction of Buggy the Clown

Tuesday, January 7th, 2025 08:02 pm

Tags:

(no subject)

Monday, January 6th, 2025 04:20 pm

check out today's entry at its real home as part of our new year's "daily HTML project"!

Chores:

Catbox cleaned
several loads of trash to the garbage
dishes done
stove wiped
put together new clothes rack
laundry sorted
clothes rehung
box of clothes sorted
bedroom tidied, sorted
vacuumed bedroom
old garment rack taken apart

Dinner:

Buffalo chicken dip with brocolli and tortilla chips

fic:

Edited and posted chapter 18 of Red Shift
Dofcora double drabble (text below)

Painted Smile Smeared

Doflamingo had no idea why his brother had been crying, but the sight of the smeared makeup all over his face made his heart ache. Doffy grabbed Rosi around the middle from behind, and nuzzled his face comfortingly against his neck.
"Corazon, what's wrong? Are you alright? Is there someone I need to kill?"
Rosi shuddered against him, and put his hands gently on Doffy's hands, shaking his head 'no'. With a soft breath, Doffy could tell he'd started to cry again.
That was okay. Doffy knew sometimes when someone comforted you, it hurt worse before it would get better.
-

Rosi let his brother hold him. He leaned into his arms, letting Doffy gently support his tired, pain filled, scarred body.

His spine was aching from the augmentations again. He could never tell Doffy that. And he could never tell Doffy the real reason why he was crying, either.

He'd lived with Doffy and his 'family' for months now, and no matter how often Rosinante repeated to himself the mantra that his brother was pure evil, he was born evil and couldn't be changed, he couldn't believe it any more.

And Rosi still would be forced to help destroy him.

Please leave kudos and comments on AO3

Art:

bunny divider by Milku-san | sky divider by Cloudtrapper

Tags:

End of the Year Report

Tuesday, December 31st, 2024 06:54 am

Partner woke up feeling better this morning. No fever, much more lucid than last night. Able to take a shower and enjoy breakfast. I'm still not feeling particularly bad (no sore throat, very mild fatigue) but I'm still expecting it to hit me- when I least expect it of course.

Had black coffee (decaf), and peanut butter mousse (peanutbutter, cream cheese, heavy cream, vanilla, sweetener) for breakfast and that was very enjoyable.

Sitting here now, deciding how to use the last day of calendar year 2024.

What a year it's been.

Started the year writing Resident Evil. Then moved to writing Urusei Yatsura. After that, Ace Attorney, and we actually finished a whole, very well received Ace Attorney longfic, though I have a lot of complicated feelings about it.

We read the entirety of One Piece this year, starting in May. It took us about 2 months to catch up and it was a very frustrating experience in a lot of ways. There are just enough things to like about One Piece to keep us coming back.

Now, here at the end of the year we've gotten back into Final Fantasy 7, which was not at all what I expected. Honestly the material is a lot more natively enjoyable than OP, which is refreshing.

According to AO3 statistics, partner and we wrote over a million words this year, which I think is pretty impressive. it's definitely our highest recorded word count. It might even be our highest ever yearly word count, though the year we wrote Danganronpa 4 might have given it a run for its money.

Two new system member woke up this year, Cable, who we hadn't seen since we were around 11, and Elizabeth who had never been awake in the system before. Monet/Lucrecia joined us in our partner's system this year as well, which was a hell of a day.

In January of 2024 we had started keeping a paper journal, which we worked on quite diligently-- for a month. We're planning to try again this year but I don't expect it to turn out a lot better.

We made roast duck for christmas this year, which was a first. It came out really well, and I'm hoping to make it a tradition. I don't plan to make the movie we watched with christmas dinner a tradition though. 1985's Santa Claus the movie apparently bombed for a good reason.

The system members who were the most active this year were probably: Chris, Hubert, Kaoru, Hal and Jas, Kirigiri (me), Jasmine, and Nikolai. Which, interestingly aside from Kaoru is the old gang from back in high school.

At the end of May we (Kaoru/Bobby, Hubert and Athena) went to the local zoo which was probably the best day trip of the whole year. We have a ton of photos and everyone had a wonderful time, even if we were really tired by the time we got back. The hot dog place Bobby found for us to eat at on the way home was also killer and we've been back there a few times already.

In October we made baklava for partner's work potluck and it came out amazing! I couldn't have a lot of it, but I was really impressed with how well it turned out despite us never having made it before. It just goes to show you how well cooking/baking will go as long as you follow the recipe.

We had a couple of fun trips in early June. There was a trip to the big thrift mall which was really enjoyable, and on June 2nd, which was the day that one piece "really hit" Komaru/Buggy and Leon/Shanks put a bunch of picnic food in the cooler, got in the car and did a spontaneous beach trip.

Here at the very end of the year, we've finally been able to get into drawing again without pain, which marks the end of an extremely frustrating 3 year hiatus. I can't say enough how much drawing does for our mental health.

The new year is always tied up with our birthday for us, since it's so close to it. In just two weeks we'll be in the final year of our thirties, before we hit the big "40" in 2026. We started this journal back in high school. It's a hell of a thing to be still updating it today, even hosted on another website.

I don't know. I felt nostalgic this morning.

It was a good year. A really good year.

Current Mood: positive

Tags:

evening update

Monday, December 30th, 2024 10:11 pm

Partner has been feeling miserable all day and has a (very mild) fever this evening. I am very much expecting to be sick too, soon. Coughing, sneezing, runny nose, sore throat, the works lol. Partner's started out with a sore throat so I'm on the lookout for it. In the meantime just trying to to enjoy getting to spend time with them and take care of them. We watched a bunch of old two best friends videos and some MST3K today since that's some of the easiest media when you can't really focus. Two best friends was disaster report, and mst3k was Time Chasers which I hadn't seen before.

Tags:

Morning report

Monday, December 30th, 2024 06:39 am

Our partner woke up miserable this morning. Sneezing and coughing and dripping and moaning and groaning.

And the toughest fight is still going to be trying to convince them that it's okay to stay home from work.

So yeah, looks like I was overly optimistic yesterday about them not being sick! ah well!

I'm probably next XD

Tags:

Early morning

Sunday, December 29th, 2024 05:35 am

Our partner was snoring and woke us up, then woke up themselves with a sore throat. Oops. XD Well, it's fine. We're chilling on the couch with cups of tea, and I'm confident partner isn't sick.

Yesterday we were supposed to go to their dad's house for late christmas, but it got pushed off til today because everyone in the family is injured or sick or busy.

We'll see if it actually happens today.

Been trying to come up with a good way to spend our xmas/birthday money and coming up empty. Were thinking about upgrading our cell phone but anything that's in our price range isn't an upgrade, and anything that's an upgrade I don't feel happy spending on a phone.

That's the way it is i guess.

Tags:

Merryposting

Wednesday, December 25th, 2024 04:16 pm

Today we:

woke up late
had peppermint hot cocoa instead of coffee
breakfast: deviled eggs, sharp cheddar cheese, and pickles
watched The Family Man with Nic Cage
shopped online with Xmas money
listened to christmas carols while cooking
Made roast duck with potatoes and veggies
Watched 1985's "Santa Clause the Movie"
Had eggnog and milano cookies
Ate dinner and watched "The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus"
Had a brief visit from some family members

And we're currently settling in to play our new video games!

Reading Reflection: The Empty Mirror

Thursday, December 12th, 2024 03:51 pm

"The Empty Mirror" is a reflection by the author, Janwillem van de Wetering, on his time living and studying meditation in a Buddhist monastery in Kyoto in the late 1950s.

The account was published (and I presume written) more than ten years later in 1971, and one of the most immediately fascinating parts of the text is the way it reflects the cultural views and attitudes of the time it was lived, and published in. There are definitely elements of the text that would shock a sensitive reader.

At one point "Jan-san" (as he's called in the text) reflects almost idly, or perhaps meditatively, on a sexual assault that he committed– rubbing up against a woman on a train. This is given no particular weight and doesn't dwell in his conscience, in fact he seems to write with no shame in enjoying it. The account is broadly misogynistic in general– the presence of women is almost never commented on, and when they are, it is in conjunction with sexual activity. Homosexuality, in contrast, if brought up several times in the text and while the author does not write about participating in it, its repeated referencing, and the comment that it's "more normal in Japan" as well as other comments lead me to speculate that he did participate, and simply left it out of his account.

More fascinating than speculating on Jan-san's sexual activity or lack of it, and closer to the point of the narrative, is his study of Zen meditation. The author came to Japan to study under a master with the hope of reaching enlightenment– in his own words, finding out the purpose of life. What's fascinating to me in his account is how absolutely bad he is at it. And he writes about being bad at it. The central theme of the narrative is that Jan-san absolutely sucks as a monk the entire time he's living and studying. At the beginning of his studies he's given a "koan" (a meditative story) to solve as his training, and over the course of the narrative he never solves it. It's repeatedly made clear that other students solve their koans much faster, and Jan-san just can't do it. He spends a lot of time smoking, and he goes to the bath house, and he has sex with whores. He gets hemorrhoids from trying to sit lotus style. He meditates 11 hours a day, and he leaves Japan without ever getting closer to the answers that he was looking for.

The Empty Mirror strikes me as a meditation on, and reflection on hubris, and ultimately on failure. The author seems excessively self-involved and it frankly doesn't surprise me that he was unable to solve his koan, because throughout the narrative the biggest character is not just Jan-san, but his ego. His own obsessive need to be succeeding, to solve things, to be in control and enjoy himself. This makes for a wild departure with other accounts of Zen study that I've read which tend to center the teachings, or the other people that the author met and interacted with. The Empty Mirror is a navel gaze, and a fascinating look at the author's psyche.

Aside from being a 'what not to do when studying Zen" manual, one of the things I loved best about The Empty Mirror was its look at the Japan of the era from an outsider's eyes, even if it was admittedly shallow due to its author's self involvement.

I don't know if I'd recommend the work to most people, but I can say that it held my attention through the entire book, and that I read it in one sitting. I think elements of it will stay in my head for a while– maybe next time I'm feeling a little too smug.

Tags:

books,
🔫🦢

Post-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving

Friday, November 29th, 2024 05:08 pm

Today we:

watched the rest of the 1985 Macy's parade and ate home made crustless pumpkin pie with fresh whipped cream for breakfast.
Cooked turkey and side dishes (mashed potatoes, stuffing, roasted carrots) together while listening to 80s christmas commercials.
Watched the rifftrax of Santa Claus and the Ice Cream Bunny while eating Deviled eggs.
Watched Puff the Magic Dragon
Ate dinner and watched An American Tail.
Are currently chilling out video gaming and tumblring.

Tags:

Afternoon Update

Thursday, October 3rd, 2024 12:32 pm

Just got back from a very eventful afternoon walk.

First off, instead of chiming the hour, the church nearby was for some reason playing an extremely discordant (and I think off-key) melody instead of chiming the hour the entire time we were out. All I could think was that it sounded like the sort of thing you'd hear in a video game to represent the total breakdown of linear time in the area.

Then as I was passing the corner store a very friendly guy walking in called out to me about the Heart Pirates t-shirt I was wearing and we had a friendly exchange of mutual fandom. (He had Luffy stickers on his car.) (~~He doesn't even know he just met Doflamingo.)~~

Tags:

The cozy times are upon us

Friday, September 27th, 2024 10:20 am

The weather is finally pleasant again. Cool enough for snuggling under blankets, and for drinking teas and broths. I just had a lovely cup of chicken broth-- very satisfying.

Last night's hurricane was less wonderful. Both we and our partner were hideously affected by the change in pressure, causing migraines and anxiety. Once we figured out what was causing it, it was easier to ignore at least

Showed up at the doctor's this morning for an appointment-- unfortunately the appointment turned out to be on monday! Oops!

Current Mood: cheerful

Tags:

Evening update

Saturday, September 21st, 2024 08:08 pm

Quiet night here tonight. Its raining out. It's been raining out since we woke up this morning. We spent the morning running errands-- picking up mail from the in-laws' house, doing some shopping. Then we made the frankly bizarre decision to go to the mall in the city. It was fun but it was A) nervous driving due to the rain, and B) busy as fuck because apparently there was a sport game happening right nearby.

Well, we've been home for a few hours now. Cozied in. Had some tea. Partner is playing Route 96, and together we're slowly picking away at writing more of Crimson Sunset, Azure Dawn (and setting up for some Ragpickers and Urchins tomorrow.)

Current Mood: peaceful

Tags:

Evening update

Tuesday, September 17th, 2024 07:44 pm

Well. Today was absolutely fucking miserable for no goddamn reason. Brain chemistry out of whack. V_V Spent the beginning of the day doing absolutely jack shit nothing, and the second half of the day playing Animal Crossing New Horizons.

Did NOT make the dinner we planned--- instead as soon as partner came home we fucked off for Longhorn Steakhouse.

But FIRST we had to put air in the tire.

The first place we went, the pump was busted physically.

The second place had an out of order sign.

Finally, at the third random fucking has station we'd never been to before the pump was working.

At least our waitress was nice. She called us both 'hon' which was great and apparently people don't like that so we had a joking little conversation about it.

Got home. Have a cup of green tea with ginger and sat down to write with partner. Finally feeling calm and stable. Mostly.

We'll see what tomorrow brings. But one thing's for sure tomorrow I'm making naan.

And probably playing more animal crossing.

Current Mood: pissed off

Tags:

Saturday Morning Updates

Sunday, September 15th, 2024 10:29 am

Nice morning. Woke up with partner (Vivi) and had coffee and did some writing for a while. Out of a beautiful morning running errands. Started at the dollar store getting birthday cards for partner's work. Grabbed coffee and a donut and breakfast sandwiches at honeydew. Now we're at the in laws house and feeding the dogs, chilling and drinking coffee about to head out to get groceries.

Just having a really pleasant time.

Current Mood: pleased

Tags:

[One Piece] (Drabble) Secondhand Affection

Monday, September 9th, 2024 08:54 am

Passing bottles and smokes back and forth was a form of intimacy Doflamingo learned early— too early— hammered deep into his being like his need for physical touch. He clutched Crocodile in his lap and grabbed puffs off his cigar, offering his bottle of wine in return.

Crocodile made like he only put up with it of course, but Doflamingo knew better. If he wasn't enjoying himself the bastard would probably just turn into a pile of sand. Croc might not admit it but when he sipped the wine and passed it back to him wordlessly, Doffy knew he cared.

Tags:

Morning Update

Monday, September 9th, 2024 08:36 am

Its been a week, I think. Not much to say about last week. A lot of writing. This weekend we finished Broken, Bleeding, Mended, though it's yet to go up.. In the middle of planning now for the next thing.

I don't know why our cooking has been so bad lately. The depression, probably? It seems like everything we cook turns out badly. Hoping tonights dinner-- sandwiches--- can't be messed up.

I feel disorganized, and longing. There are things I want to do, but there are other things that I want to do in front of and in conflict with them. Part of the problem with being a system, really. And definitely a problem with being kin.

Oh well.

The weather's nice today, though later in the week the temperature is (sadly) going to go back up to the low 80s. I miss the colder weather up north, but admittedly I like the less snow down here.

I don't know I don't really have any 'point' of writing today I just didn't want to stop journaling.

Had a rather lovely lunch with Deluge (koala) on saturday. Wings at the "Boneyard". They were really good though very heavily sauced. we walked around the mall. Put air in the tires. Discussed our writing. All good stuff.

Current Mood: thoughtful
Current Music: old summer reckoining

Tags:

[One Piece] (Drabble) Little Boxes

Friday, August 30th, 2024 04:18 pm

Doffy hummed to himself, skipping back and forth as he watched the destruction of the town. His gang's power tumbled the houses, the streets lurched and wobbled, and people found themselves stuck like flies in a glue trap.

It was an amazing feeling, being the one in control of this kind of destruction and violence. The people who had hurt him and made him scream were hurting and screaming now. They were all just faceless monsters in the chaos, the same wicked and mocking mob that haunted his dreams.

He laughed as their homes crumbed to dust like his innocence.

-

Little boxes on the hillside
Little boxes made of ticky tacky
Little boxes on the hillside
Little boxes all the same
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same
And the people in the houses
All went to the university
Where they were put in boxes
And they came out all the same

Tags:

music

Friday, August 30th, 2024 04:16 pm

Today's been a listening to music day today. Before lunchtime I spent about 40 minutes just laying down and listening to 80s music and J-pop. Just now, while I was making dinner, "Little Boxes" popped into my head.

My favorite version of that song is the Decemberists version, which is so menacing, and it reminded me of my love of the Decemberists, so now I'm going through some of their music again.

Current Music: Shankhill Butchers - Decemberists

Tags:

music,
🔍⚔️

Well, I might be cursed

Thursday, August 29th, 2024 03:54 pm

Went to peel potatoes and the potatoes were rotten. My thumb popped right through a soft spot with a very unpleasant sensation.

Then later I went to get the chicken started and it smells... very off.

We're having taco bell tonight. DX

Current Mood: distressed

Tags:

Sinister System

Villainous Things

January 2025

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1/10/2025

Today's Thoughts:

Accomplishments:

Dinner:

fic:

Art (from the last several days):

[fanart] The Seduction of Buggy the Clown

(no subject)

Chores:

Dinner:

fic:

Painted Smile Smeared

Art:

End of the Year Report

evening update

Morning report

Early morning

Merryposting

Reading Reflection: The Empty Mirror

Post-Thanksgiving Thanksgiving

Afternoon Update

The cozy times are upon us

Evening update

Evening update

Saturday Morning Updates

[One Piece] (Drabble) Secondhand Affection

Morning Update

[One Piece] (Drabble) Little Boxes

music

Well, I might be cursed